


road work ahead

by ramvne



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, Group chat, M/M, Nonbinary Akaashi Keiji, Nonbinary Ennoshita Chikara, Nonbinary Kozume Kenma, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Indulgent, Slow Burn, Trans Terushima Yuuji, Trans Yahaba Shigeru, chatfic, gonna try at least, next gen captains, nonbinary shirabu kenjirou, none of them r cishet i make the rules, trans futakuchi kenji
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2020-03-10
Packaged: 2020-11-26 05:10:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20924690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ramvne/pseuds/ramvne
Summary: shitabu: fuck youhimbo rights: i mean if ur offering ;)shitabu: die maybehimbo rights: no thanks[ aka the next gen cap chatfic only i asked for ]





	1. and so it begins

**Author's Note:**

> Ennoshita: capn crunch
> 
> Shirabu: shitabu
> 
> Terushima: himbo rights
> 
> Futakuchi: 5 peepee man
> 
> Yahaba: i think dogs should vote
> 
> Akaashi: alexa, play despacito
> 
> Kenma: applepi

**_himbo rights _ ** _ has added _ ** _capn crunch, shitabu, 5 peepee man, _ ** _ and _ ** _i think dogs should vote _ ** _ to group chat: _ ** _new captains group chat (note to self: think of a better name later)_ **

**(4:56pm) new captains group chat (note to self: think of a better name later)**

**himbo rights: **go crazy aaaaaaaah go stupid

**shitabu: **what the fuck is this

**i think dogs should vote: **a group chat, obviously

**i think dogs should vote: **god, keep up

**shitabu: **i don't want to be here 

**himbo rights: **this is a group chat i made for all the new captains starting this coming school year :D 

**himbo rights: **ik it's still a little early but :P i wanted to get to know u guys !!! 

**himbo rights: **i luv making fwiends uwu

**himbo rights: **also it's only u guys bc i couldn't think of anyone else lolol

**shitabu: **no thanks

** _shitabu_ ** _ has left group _

**i think dogs should vote:** good riddance

** _himbo rights_ ** _ has added _ ** _shitabu _ ** _ to group chat: _ ** _new captains group chat (note to self: think of a better name later)_ **

**himbo rights:** no leaving >:(

**shitabu:** ugh

**himbo rights:** now then :) in case yall don't kno me, i'm terushima yuuji the johzenji cap hehe 

**himbo rights:** yall can intro urselves if u want

**i think dogs should vote:** you all should know of me, i'm yahaba. the seijoh captain 

**capn crunch: **i'm ennosita, the captain of karasuno

**capn crunch: ***ennoshita

**capn crunch: **can't believe i mispelled my own name

**himbo rights: **lmaooo rip

**5 peepee man: **hey it's ya boy uhh skinny penis

**5peepee man: **but yall can call me futakuchi im from dateko

**shitabu: **i'm shirabu from shiratorizawa i guess

**himbo rights: **u guess ? fcking commit 2 it shirabu

**shitabu: **fuck you

**himbo rights: **i mean if ur offering ;)

**shitabu: **die maybe

**himbo rights: **no thanks

**5 peepee man: **anyways time to act on what weve alll been thinking

**_5 peepee man _ ** _ has changed the group name to _ ** _road work ahead_ **

**5 peepee man: **srry the old name was ugly lol

**himbo rights: **fair enough

  


++

**(5:16pm) washijou sucks peepee**

**shitabu:** who wants to hear me complain ?

**shitabu:** everyone ?

**shitabu:** good

**tendowou: **lol whn r u not complainngg kenjirou ????

**shitabu: **shut the fuck up

**ace ace baby: **tendou does have a point !

**tendowou:** thank u tsutomuuuu~~~

**ace ace baby:** !! of course :D

**shitabu:** i hate both of you

**ace ace baby:** :(

**tendowou: **no u dont :]]]

**semicircle: **don't make the baby sad ://

**shitabu:** shut up

**shitabu: **anyways i got added to a group chat with the captains of some other schools and it's worse than this chat

**shitabu:** because while i hate all of you, i at least know you

**shitabu:** i don't actually know anyone in there :/ it's annoying

**st valentine: **so mean to ur senpais shirabu :(

**shitabu: **we been knew

**shitabu: **also they're now arguing about the group chat photo i'm gonna yell

**shitabu: **they keep changing it to different kermit love memes and arguing about which one is better

**shitabu:** why does it matter ??? they're all the same thing

**tendowou:** 1 day, kenjirouu. 1dsy. u will find luv. & u woll see how they r dofferenyt

**shitabu:** please for the love of god learn how to type

**shitabu:** also

**shitabu:** sounds fake but ok

**semicircle: **love is wonderful, shirabu

**semicircle: **it's so unfortunate that ur incapable of it :P

**shitabu: **fuck off

**uwushijima: **That is uncalled for, Eita

**ace ace baby: **yeah that was mean :(

**shitabu: **yeah, semi. you're so mean to me. you should apologize to me for this incredible amount of rudeness

**semicircle: **no fuck you

**shitabu: **no thanks, i have standards :)

**shitabu: **anyways, it's late i'm going to bed. goodnight to everyone except semi and tendou, ill see you all in pactice tomorrow

**semicircle: **happy nightmares

**tendowou: **gn u ,ittle shit staon

**uwushijima:** Goodnight, kenjirou. I will see you tomorrow.

**ace ace baby:** gnnnnnn


	2. futakuchi has fucking died

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> enter akaashi and kenma, plus some brief cookie run discussion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its been so long :pensive: i dont really have an excuse i just didnt know how to end the chapter hah a
> 
> hopefully i'll update more often
> 
> Ennoshita: capn crunch
> 
> Shirabu: shitabu
> 
> Terushima: himbo rights
> 
> Futakuchi: 5 peepee man
> 
> Yahaba: i think dogs should vote
> 
> Akaashi: alexa, play despacito
> 
> Kenma: applepi

**(1:19pm) road work ahead**

**capn crunch: **hey can i add a couple more captains to this chat

**capn crunch:** they're cool

**himbo rights: **hell funking yeah dude

**himbo rights: **the more the merrier !!!

**capn crunch: **cool

**capn crunch ** has added **applepi ** and **alexa, play despacito ** to group chat: **road work ahead**

**himbo rights:** hello ! pls intro urselves so we know who u r

**alexa, play despacito: **hello. i'm akaashi keiji, the captain of fukurodani

**capn crunch: **applepi is kenma from nekoma. i'm introducing them because they said they were going to be a little busy for a while

**alexa, play despacito: **most likely playing cookie run

**capn crunch:** yeah probably

**capn crunch: **anyways, they're from a couple tokyo teams that are friendly with karasuno, and i felt it'd be nice to include them :)

**5 peepee man: **that was nice of you, ennoshita 

**5 peepee man:** uwu & welcome to hell, you two

**i think dogs should vote:** this chat hasnt been around long enough to become hell yet. it's been fun so far i think

**shitabu:** i beg to differ

**i think dogs should vote:** then beg

**5 peepee man:** nah, it's def hell

**5 peepee man:** our personal litlle demon even showed up *gestures to shirabu*

**shitabu: **both of you shut up

**alexa, play despacito: **very lively chat so far

**capn crunch:** i suppose

**himbo rights:** i personaly am lovign the vibes in here so far

**himbo rights: **im sure well all b graet friends uwu

**shitabu:** learn how to type before getting your hopes up

**himbo rights:** hatsh :/

**shitabu:** *harsh

**himbo rights: **;(

**applepi:** no mercy kill

**applepi: **also hello i'm done playing cookie run. nice to meet you all i guess

**alexa, play despacito: **called it

**applepi:** i get it, i'm predictable

**applepi:** anyways stan strawberry cookie

**himbo rights:** cheerleader cookie is best girl but go off i guess

**applepi:** wow the lack of taste

**shitabu:** lemon cookie is way better :/

**capn crunch: **r u all really arguing abt cookies in a game ?

**himbo rights:** yes

**applepi:** yes

**shitabu:** yes

**alexa, play despacito: **none of you mentioned whipped cream and i'm disappointed :/ 

**capn crunch:** really, keiji ? you too ?

**alexa, play despacito: **yes. you know how much i love whipped cream cookie.

**capn, crunch:** ya i guess i did 

**capn crunch: **dk why i'm surprised :P

**5 peepee man:** GUYS I'M GONNA DIE

**shitabu: **good

**capn crunch:** god i wish that were me

**i think dogs should vote:** why r u dying ??????

**5 peepee man:** ok so my old senpai kamasaki messaged our group chat to tell everyone that he was dating shiratorizawa’s old setter, semi, and I jokingly called him a slut while everyone else was congradulating him

**shitabu: **oh yeah, i remember semi mentioning that he got a boyfriend

**5 peepee man:** and he got mad abt it, which is fair enouh ig, even tho i didn't man anythign by it

**5 peepee man:** like ? we’re all sluts at heart, get over it

**5 peepee man:** anyways then he privately messaged me “run” and hasnt responded for 15 mins so it's safe to assume that he's coming to kill meredtfygu

**i think dogs should vote:** ????? wht happened 

**capn crunch:** well he's dead

**himbo rights:** shouldn't have called kamasaki a slut lol he's jacked

**i think dogs should vote: **futakuchi pls answer so we know ur ok

**capn crunch:** rest in pieces

**capn crunch:** anyways

**capn crunch:** i'm gonna be inactive for a few hours ill talk later ✌️

**alexa, play despacito: **i am as well

**shitabu:** bye

**i think dogs should vote:** ttyl <3

**himbo rights:** bye !!! also yahaba that heart was really cute ;3

**i think dogs should vote: **u//w//u

**shitabu:** disgusting

**i think dogs should vote: **you're disgusting

**shitabu: **at least i'm not flirting in the gc 

**himbo rights:** oops callin me out lol

**i think dogs should vote: **sxdfcgvhb

**i think dogs should vote:** i'm not flirting, just acknowledging the compliment >:P

**himbo rights:** sad whip 😔👊

**shitabu:** lol imagine being rejected by a loser like yahaba

**i think dogs should vote:** you're the loser here, and i'm rejecting you too >:(

**shitabu:** i didn't even appl, how can you reject me ? 

**shitabu:** *apply

**5 p** **eepee man:** WOW

**5 peepee man:** u all were so quick to kill me off >:(

**shitabu:** if u didn't die, then what happened ?

**i think dogs should vote:** ^^

**5 peepee man:** ok so kamasaki came over and he knows my moms aren't home rn so he jusst started banging on the door

**5 peepee man:** that's when i dropped my phone and everyone pronounced me dead

**5 peepee man:** anyways i called him a slut again bc i thought it would b funny (it was) but i forgot i told him where the emergency key is held once so he got in

**i think dogs should vote:** omg

**5 peepee man:** then he pinned me to the ground with his fat ass for like fifteen minutes before i said sorry and congratulating him on getting a bf willinng to put up w him

**5 peepee man:** now he's sitting on my couch and eating my chips

**shitabu:** good for him

**himbo rights:** lmao rippppp

**5 peepee man:** ok i got him to leave

**5 peepee man:** threatening to tell his boyfriend and generally being annoyin did the trick 😌

**shitabu: **yeah you seem pretty annoying. i doubt it was very hard

**5 peepee man:** hey rude

**Author's Note:**

> im trying i hope this is good :pensive: dont hesitate to leave concrit or ideas, just dont b mean im sensitive aubrey
> 
> tumblr: @bokuatsu, @pissmoths, or @nbshirabu
> 
> twitter: @pissmoths or @yuujilovebot


End file.
